Sunday 19 January 2014

Script to Screen Script

INT. Mother's Bedroom - NIGHT

CRAB LEFT: DAUGHTER appears at door holding strip of old photo booth photos
MEDIUM SHOT: MOTHER in bed, smiles and beckons DAUGHTER
MEDIUM SHOT: MOTHER and DAUGHTER in bed
POV SHOT: MOTHER holding photos, points at FATHER in photo
EXT. TOKYO ROLLER RINK PARK - EVENING - 10 YEARS PREVIOUS
ESTABLISHING SHOT: View of some kind of summertime fayre, with ROLLER RINK in centre, blossom trees all around
MEDIUM SHOT: MOTHER leaning against roller rink rail LOOKS RIGHT
MEDIUM SHOT: FATHER smiles widely and hands drink
MEDIUM SHOT: large GRIN crawls across MOTHER's face
WIDE SHOT -PAN LEFT: Camera follows MOTHER and FATHER as then run past stalls, drink spilling as they run
WIDE SHOT: MOTHER and FATHER run towards camera and veer LEFT into photo booth
INT. PHOTO BOOTH

PHOTO BOOTH LENS:MOTHER and FATHER pose for 4 silly photos, Screen BLACKOUT for split second each time- STILL of photo shown
EXT. TOKYO ROOF - nIGHT

MEDIUM SHOT: MOTHER and FATHER lying on roof, hands behind heads
EXTREME WIDE SHOT - PAN UP: Tokyo skyline panning up to night sky full of stars, two are shining brighter than the others. FATHER's hand points up and point at the two stars in turn
MEDIUM SHOT: MOTHER and FATHER laying next to each other, FATHER points at MOTHER and himself in turn. They kiss
EXT. NEWLY BOUGHT HOUSE - dAY
WIDE SHOT- PAN LEFT: MOTHER and FATHER stood out NEWLY BOUGHT HOUSE, FATHER shakes keys and both grin. Their figures are shadows on the house behind. As the shot PANS we see just the shadows of MOTHER hugging FATHER dramatically, kicking one leg in the air
INT. PHOTO BOOTH

FIRST STILL: MOTHER and FATHER big grins
SECOND STILL:FATHER taps MOTHER on opposite shoulder to where he is sat, MOTHER's head is turned opposite way as if to see who's tapping her
THIRD STILL: FATHER opens up small box with proposal ring inside, MOTHER's head still turned the other way
FOURTH STILL: MOTHER sees ring, hands clasped round mouth
FIFTH STILL: MOTHER and FATHER happy embrace
EXT. KITCHEN

MEDIUM SHOT: MOTHER hands FATHER brown paper lunch bag with "Good Luck!" written on it
MEDIUM SHOT: FATHER (who is in a SUIT holding a BRIEFCASE) happily accepts bag and runs towards door
MEDIUM SHOT: FATHER opens door enthusiastically after first day of work
         SAME SHOT REPEATS 4 TIMES EACH TIME FATHER
        LOOKS MORE AND MORE DISHEVELLED AND STRESSED
MEDIUM SHOT: MOTHER smiling happily at FATHER's return
         SAME SHOT REPEATS 4 TIMES EACH TIME MOTHER
         LOOKS MORE AND MORE SHOCKED AND UPSET, AND
         PREGNANT. ALSO IN BACKGROUND MORE BILLS CAN
                BE SEEN ON THE NOTICE BOARD
INT. FATHER's OFFICE

PAN SHOT: MOTHER's back in foreground looking into office, FATHER sat in darkened office behind, head in hand on desk, PAN to reveal more of FATHER
CLOSE UP: FATHER's desk covered in paper, empty bottles in background, FATHER hits fist on desk
MEDIUM SHOT: MOTHER reaches hand towards FATHER, FATHER turns round angrily and throws bottle towards MOTHER
CLOSE UP: BOTTLE explodes against wall
EXT. AOKIGAHARA FOREST

WIDE SHOT CRAB: View of the Aokigahara forest. FATHER stumbling through trees in distance getting closer to camera. He is holding some rope which is winding through the trees.
MEDIUM SHOT: Shot focuses on teary eyed, angry looking FATHER, who is holding rope as he walks, Forest can be seen moving in the background as if he is walking.
CLOSE UP SHOT: FATHER's hand drop the end of the rope
CLOSE UP SHOT: FATHER is looking up. ZOOM OUT to reveal tall tree with hanging rope

EXT. TOKYO ROLLER RINK PARK - NIGHT
-It is Winter, dark and rainy- Pathetic fallacy-
WIDE SHOT: MOTHER walks slowly alone passed closed stalls. No one is on the ice rink. Same angle as previous shot where FATHER and MOTHER run together
MEDIUM SHOT: MOTHER walks sadly round corner towards photo booth, again same shot as previous
PHOTO BOOTH SHOT: MOTHER stares solemnly towards camera, FATHER's ghost comes through side of the booth and kisses MOTHER on cheek. She does not move. GHOSTLY HANDS come from the top of the booth and tie GHOSTLY ROPE around MOTHER's neck. MOTHER closes her eyes and shakes her head and the ghosts dissolve.
EXT. MOTHER'S BEDROOM
CLOSE UP PAN SHOT: MOTHER wipes tear from eye as DAUGHTER is asleep. Shot PANS across to show FATHER's ghost looking sadly in. Shot PANs up to the night sky where only one star is flickering brightly.


2 comments:

  1. Livi - I've got a radical proposition for you: What happens if you cut the daughter completely? It seems to me that the key moment here is when the young wife decides 'to live' - i.e. refusing the notion of suicide and sadly saying farewell to the 'ghost' of the husband. It just seems stronger to essentialise your narrative so it's about grieving and deciding to 'be in the world'. The fact that she's got a daughter tells us that she's already made that decision, so the story lacks a bit of tension. If you imagine instead that she's looking at these photos because she's contemplating going to the forest herself - that her suicidal thoughts have prompted this moment of introspection. Indeed, I can sort of imagine that, instead of the ghost husband putting the rope around the widow's neck, he actually does the opposite - we see him take it off, prompting her to leave the photobooth (the past) and step back out into the world. I just don't think the daughter is actually giving you anything in story terms - certainly now that the 'rollerskate' is connected to the origin of the romance, and not to anything associated with children or childhood. The idea that she returns to the photo booth one last time before going to the forest, and that the photos reveal the ghost of her husband, who in that series of photos messages her that she should 'move on' - that could be a very beautiful gesture. Your script, in general terms, reads very well - very evocative - but do you need the daughter at all? Discuss! :)

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    1. Hmm I quite like the idea of more tension around the time of her contemplating suicide actually

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